Regaining Balance in an Unbalanced World
by Dr. Theresa Yonker

Stress is a growing part of the everyday life of men, women, teenagers and children throughout the Western world. Hectic schedules are now the norm. It seems we are always running from work to school, sports, and extracurricular activities. I believe it is time to pause. Breathe. Be in the present moment. Unfortunately, most of us do not know how to do that. I sure didn't. I would like to share with you how I learned to slow down, and be. Just be. No agenda. No time schedule. It has transformed my life. It can transform yours as well.

The beginning of 2003 found me to be a busy child psychiatrist, working full time. I was also raising two young children with my husband, who manages his own business. We were always in motion, and not at all able to enjoy our children, our family life, or the home we worked so hard to build. Then, one day, it happened. My hard drive crashed. I realized I was leading a life over which I had lost control. When and how could this have occurred?

I began a journey of searching. The first step was acceptance of my present state of being. The second step was scarier: letting go. Through practices such as Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Art of Living Breathwork, guided imagery, meditation, yoga, and Conscious Parenting, a channel opened. A lifeboat called Possibility emerged, and I leapt in. My boat soon gained momentum, as along the path I encountered so many others headed in the same direction. As I healed, my true calling emerged: empower my friends, family and community to awaken their own innate potential to heal themselves.

Today, my husband and I are changing the shape of our future, and our children's as well. I believe that our children are our future. But without the present moment being all it can be, our children will not have the vision to shape the future. By our example, we teach our children the verbal and nonverbal way to deal with happy moments, sad moments, frightening moments, and most importantly, stress. Were we ever taught how to deal with it? I see stress already in the schedules of kindergarten aged children, even preschoolers.

We can slow down, stop. Listen to ourselves. Listen to our children. Be present with them, really present. To do so, we first must stop. Be with our selves. If we can, take some time off work. Discover the true selves that have been lost in the shuffle. Then we can be with our children. We can create the environment in which they have the time and the freedom to be in touch with themselves, the true inner self with wants and needs which are clear to them. To do that takes time. I believe it is the best investment of time that we can make.

By learning to be in the present moment, you will regain control of your life. You can consciously transform yourself, (mind, body, spirit) to be more in balance, healthier, and happier. One way to start on this path is to come visit the Reflexins Holistic Wellness Center, which I recently founded here in Red Hook. Reflexions is committed to serving our community's children, teenagers and adults. We are a group of holistic- minded health care providers who will help you use your inner wisdom to achieve a sense of well being. Our practitioners believe there is a still point of wisdom in each of us.

Because we are a creative group of practitioners in evolution, with you we will be adding new services based on your needs. I believe that the Center belongs to the community, and I welcome all of you to think about climbing aboard your own little boat of possibility. We can explore the present and the future together, and who knows where it could lead?

Dr. Theresa Yonker is a Board Certified Child, Adolescent, Adult, and Family Psychiatrist who has been practicing community psychiatry for 17 years. She lives in Red Hook with her husband and two children.